Three years ago as a new mom, I found myself worrying so much about money.
I had always been financially independent before having a baby and being dependent on my husband even if for a little while was not easy.
I worried a lot about where money was going to come from. How much we didn’t have. How the bills were going to be paid and the list went on and on.
It got so bad that I was afraid of spending and paying bills even when we had money in the bank.
If I didn’t find a way to stop worrying about money so much, I was going to ruin my relationship, miss out on special joyful moments of motherhood and go into depression.
So I got to work. Most of everything I discovered turned into my first book Overcome & Thrive.
21 things I did to stop worrying about money for good.
Heal your relationship with God and tap into your ultimate money source
Money carries with it a current of survival. And every single day we make decisions based on our financial status.
Where we live, where we work, what we eat, what we wear and so on.
So when we are going through life transitions, the things we once leaned on to provide us with security may no longer be available.
The job, the business, the rich husband or the father we depended on to feel financially secure and assured of our survival could be gone in a blink of an eye.
And if for some reason we mistakenly thought that these things were the source of our money, then we’re left with nothing to hold on to but worry ourselves to death.
I’ve had to learn that my job, my business or my husband’s job is not the source of my income. God is.
He is the ultimate source and provider of all our needs. And no matter what challenges life brings my way, God has a plan.
God wants to provide and care for us, exceedingly and abundantly, like a good father would provide and care for his children. The question is, do you trust his plans for your life?
Are you willing to stop relying on your own strength all the time and instead find peace in surrendering your future to him?
Start counting your blessings
Most of the time, we’re mostly worrying about what we don’t have or what hasn’t even happened yet. Money worry is based on fearful and scarcity thinking.
Instead of focusing on things going wrong. Why not shift your focus on what is going right?
Start a daily gratitude practice. When you find yourself worrying about money, grab a piece of paper and start writing down everything you are grateful for right now.
Remember, those who have more will be given to them and those who don’t have, even the little they have will be taken away from them.
Being worried about money can make you want to hoard the little you have right now out of fear. I know because I did it.
But I learned that money is energy and energy needs to flow.
Holding on to money or things out of fear that you won’t be able to have them tomorrow only blocks the flow of money into your life.
Give and it will come back you.
What are you holding on to because you’re worried you won’t have money to acquire another one? Let it go. Look around your house and start getting rid of those things you’re holding on to out of scarcity thinking.
Give it away and create room for more blessings to flow into your life.
Rewrite your money story
Money pain,struggle, worry and drama comes from a money story that does not support you. The problems are only a symptom of what is going on inside you.
They’re an indication of your beliefs, attitude and thoughts about money. Have you ever asked yourself what your money story is?
Everyone has one and it affects their relationship with money.
Changing your beliefs, attitude and understanding about many can be the difference between being at peace with money and letting money be the source of pain.
In my book Overcome & Thrive, I go into more details on what to do to rewrite your money story.
Get a money mentor
If you didn’t come from a wealthy family like I did then chances are that you didn’t grow up with great money role models around you.
But you don’t have to have come from a wealthy family to have peace around money. Sometimes you just need someone who has more knowledge and experience to show you how.
If you’ve read Rich Dad Poor Dad, then you know that the rich think differently and having someone who helps you learn how to think like the rich can make a big difference in your financial life.
Another form of mentorship is working with your money archetype. Your money archetype acts as your inner mentor.
Helping you be aware of your money strengths and challenges so you can avoid sabotaging your finances.
You can discover your money archetype by taking my money quiz.
Take 100% responsibility for your life and your finances
Most women are secretly waiting to be rescued. Whether that rescue comes in form of a rich man, winning a lottery or thinking that another degree, certification or course is the answer to all your problems.
The problem with waiting to be rescued is that it puts power outside of you. You have no control.
But when you take 100% responsibility for your life, you are in charge. It makes you feel like no matter what happens, good or bad, you have the power to change it.
Sometime you can’t change the circumstances but you can change your attitude and perspective about it.
When you feel this powerful about yourself, you won’t waste any time worrying endlessly about things going wrong because you know you can handle it.
Voice your fears
Money worry is simply fear. Take a piece of paper and write down exactly what you are worried about. What is the worst thing you’re worried will happen?
It’s better to let this fear out and be aware of it than to keep it in and continue wasting your energy thinking about it and letting it control you and steal your peace of mind.
Start looking at money in the eye
If you have been avoiding looking at bank statements, paying bills or letting someone else handle all your finances, it’s time to start looking at your finances.
We fear what we don’t know. Sometimes all you need to do is to look at the numbers to understand where you are and exactly how much you need.
Chances are you’re worrying about something very small.
Set an income goal
How much money will you need to stop worrying about money?
When you’ve looked at your numbers and know where you are. Then you know how much you will need to make for money worry to be an issue of the past.
Having a goal gives you something specific to work with rather than just saying you need more money or you don’t have money.
A clear specific goal goal will also get you to start thinking about ways you could be earning more money.
Track your money
How often are you checking your bank account? Do you know how much you have?
What is measured can be improved. Track your spending. Track your income. Know where your money is coming from and know where your money is going to.
I know it is scary. It’s scary for me too. But when you know your numbers then decision making is so much easier.
I used to complain about how much I didn’t have money until I started tracking our money. And in just a few months, I noticed that our income was increasing miraculously.
My husband was offered a better paying job, I got a paying client and even a friend bought us two weeks worth of grocery out of the blues.
What you focus on grows. If you’re focusing on what you don’t have you will continue attracting more lack. But if you’re tracking what you have and what is coming in, you will start attracting even more.
Create an emergency fund and a savings goal
Most women are uncomfortable with having excess money so they spend it all and then worry about running out of money.
Start saving today.
An emergency fund will give you some form of peace. Just think about your biggest fear right now.
Are you worried about bills, losing your job or missing out on something great because you don’t have money?
Worrying won’t solve that problem. However, setting a savings goal gives you something to do to deal with that problem if it happens in future.
Currently, I’m using Digit to save up for emergencies. This app uses algorithms to save small amounts of money based on my spending.
I am impressed at how much we’ve saved in such a short time without having to think about it.
Work on paying off debt
Debt brings out a lot of shame for many women which can affect every other area of our lives. Create a debt repayment plan and start paying off debt.
You may not be able to pay so much into it but you will feel better about yourself when you are making payments towards your debt.
Create new streams of income
Money may not solve all problems but it solves a lot of problems. Get comfortable with your power to create money.
Part of my strategy to grow my faith, heal my relationship with God and rebuild my trust in God’s ability to provide for me has been to create new ways for God to provide for me.
Start a business, invest, create something and sell it. There are many ways you can make more money, choose one and take action on it.
Automate your finances
Having to remember when all the bills are due can be a source of stress. Which is why automating your finances is a must.
Most of our bills that are a specific amount each month are automated. And as I mentioned above, we also use Digit to automate our savings.
One of my favorite money automation tools has been Digit. With this app, I have automated my savings and quickly built up my emergency savings in a short time.
Automation will help you avoid forgetfulness, paying late fees and assist you with staying up to date with your financial to do list.
Open up about your finances to your spouse or people you can trust
Sometimes just opening up to someone and speaking about what you are struggling with can alleviate a lot of worry.
When I got married, I was very secretive with my money. I didn’t want my husband to find out how much I earned, what I was spending it on or the mistakes I had made. I was too embarrassed to talk about money with him.
But as we established regular conversations about our finances. As we slowly merged our finances, talking about money has become easy.
In fact I wrote a post about how to get on the same page with your spouse on your finances.
In fact, I feel less stressed out because no matter what is going on, we handle it together as a team.
Shame and fear thrive in secrecy but once you start speaking up about money with people you trust, you’re able to find solutions and feel less worried about money.
Invest in your financial education
I was lucky to find a job in a financial services firm where they paid for some of my financial education. Most people don’t have access to such resources and never make the effort to learn more about money.
Invest in your financial education just like you would in your formal education.
Take a class. Whether you want to learn about investing, money management or creating assets. Take a class and empower yourself with financial knowledge.
Find a support system
The best thing you can do is join a supportive community of people that are open to having all sorts of money conversations.
These days there are so many Facebook Groups that offer the space for these empowered conversations to take place.
Join one of them and learn from other people’s experiences so you don’t feel alone in your struggle with money.
Change your money language
Use your words to manifest better results. Monitor what you say about money. What you say about rich people. And how many times you say “ I can’t afford it”.
Use your words to trick your mind into manifesting abundance for you. Have a money mantra that you repeat especially when you start worrying about money.
I have many that I use. But my favorite is, everything is working out for my good.
Read a money book
There are many books to empower you financially. Most of which give the same advice. Pick one book, read it and implement the information in that book.
You can start with my book, Overcome & Thrive. One of my readers manifested $12,000 in two weeks just by reading the book and doing the exercises in the book.
Will you also make $12,000 in two weeks? Probably not, but you never know how your life could change by just reading a book.
My favorite thing to do when I’m worried about money is to journal. Journaling helps me work through my fears and emotions.
It is through journaling that I have significantly transformed my relationship with money.
And now I recommend it to everyone who struggles with worry, anxiety and stress around money.
So there you have it. 21 things you can do when you’re ready to stop stressing about money for good.
Did I miss anything else? Share your own ideas with me in the comments section below.